Kids and Cabernet: mom

In the five plus years I've had the privilege of being a mom, I've learned a lot. Being a mom is a hard, hard job. You are everything to your kids: doctor, therapist, chauffeur, confidant, friend, judge, cuddler, comforter, maid, cook - and the list goes on!

So how do you know when you've entered "mom status?"

You know you're a mom when...

Having an audience while you use the bathroom is the norm
Going to the store without the kids is a vacation
You sit in the car for another 10-15 minutes after your "store vacation" before you go back into the house
A glass of wine a night (or two) is needed
You randomly find pacifiers, toys, hair ties and socks in your purse
You haven't napped in years... like the really good naps
You need coffee to survive
You can hear the slightest noise your kid makes while you're in the middle of your deepest sleep
Baby wipes are the solution for spills, stains, cleaning your iPad screen ect.
You've hidden while eating sweets just to not share
The ABC's are not only for learning purposes, but you use the song to teach your kids how long they should wash their hands
You wake up and find children in your bed
Bodily fluids no longer gross you out (when coming from your kids)
You never leave the house without snacks
You care about them more than yourself
You have the ability to brush your teeth, wash your face, get dressed, and put makeup on in 5 minutes
You talk about your kids 80% of the time you're out with your mom friends and/or your husband
You catch yourself watching the Disney Channel after the kids have gone to bed
You have kid selfies on your cellphone - most of which their heads are half cut off
You say things your parents said
You constantly wonder if you're doing a good job
You find yourself negotiating with a toddler
You make up stories just so they eat, sleep and poop
Nothing sounds better than a date night or girl's night out
You cry at every mom/kid related commercial
You can experience the greatest joy and biggest headache at the same time
You can change a diaper in the dark in 10 seconds flat
You know the songs to every Disney/PBS show
Your iPad screen has finger prints and traces of food caked on the screen
You love your kids more than anything in the world